This is what I've been working on tonight :) I've got just a bit more to paint tomorrow And then it will be time to do the drawers and start sanding the next one. I wish you understood how much fun I had tonight doing this on the back porch while listening to the radio and rocking out... More pics to come and of course, the final product :) muah!

Beeb

Sleep well been

decisions decisions...

Well, let's see. ... I'm very happy to have a job. How about that? I'm very happy to work for the hospital I work for. I love the hospital and the RNs and MDs that are here. I love the teamwork and the personalities of the people that work here, the culture. I must say, I am kindof stagnant in my career and looking to do something more...CONCRETE. Having my 2nd baby really threw me for a loop in a lot of ways, mentally, DEFINITELY physically and somehow has put my career on hold. I am totally and happily okay with that. However, I want to find my niche you know? I've been saying this over and over again to many friends, my poor tireless husband, and myself since well.....right after Sethie was born. I mean...I just want to pick! Emergency ? Pediatrics? Women's care? Surgery? Cardiac. I feel like I've been all of the above and now that I have 5 years of experience as an RN, I should be able to choose. So...I'm putting myself out there, I'm sending emails. I am going to sacrifice..and choose. I'm going to choose. And, once I jump head first into whatever it is I choose, I'm not going to look back. I'm going to focus on it. If it's cardiac, I'm going to know all those rhythms and be able to spit them out at you and count them. I'm going to be able to graph them and tell you exactly what to do. If it's specifically OR, I'm going to learn all of my tools, extractors, clamps, forceps and I'm going to be able to draw them for you. If it's pediatrics, I'm going to keep doing the same thing, if it's Emergency, I will obtain trauma certification and dream of chest compressions and rapid sequence intubations. I will know my drips frontwards and backwards. But, this. This. THIS. It's not conducive to my success on the inside of me. It's not filling me up. Because it's a smorgasboard. My mother always said to do one thing and do it well. I want to be knowledgeable ablout a lot of things but a PRO at one. I feel like I am taking it on and swimming in a sea of this and that. I have a hunger for knowledge. BUT I want to be able to concentrate on MY area of expertise. PEDS, Emergency medicine, Flight nurse, OR nurse, trauma nurse,etc etc...
It is the little prayer in my little fat heart that my strong will and determination will perservere over the obstacles that stand in my way. I am a damn good nurse, a damn good person. And, I'm smart. I can think on my toes, I can chart like a son of a gun. I can draw labs and calm a crazy person down. I know how to persuade kids to take their medicine and how to hold them down and give it to them when that doesn't work. I know how much Toradol and Ativan and Morphine are too much. I know when to page a physician and when to let the stool softener wait until the morning. I'm no brain surgeon. BUT if someone taught me, I very well could be. And, I'm tired of just passing through...just going on with the flow. I'm ready to really make something of my career and be respected for that. Artists and poets, architects and professors all must work at their craft for awhile before they are good. I've worked at my craft and I'm ready to show people wassup. I'm ready for the learning and growing to continue.
Sorry...my ranting and raving is ending now.
I hope and pray that you guys are happy and fulfilled in your job. It's your home away from home. It's the reason you leave your family and loved ones everyday. And, if you don't LOVE it...you've gotta find it. Because, you're a disservice to the human race and progression and the ONENESS if you're not.
Up until now, I've been just a tumbleweed. I'm ready to lay down my roots and grow.
Most sincerely yours,
Kimmie

Blue eyes!

Look like daddy

Lips like mama

Hilarious little one!

So friggn fun 

Lots of earrings, hairdoodads, and kitchen towels :) 

Crafts crafts and more crafts

I love my family.
I love how my husband just seems to hold me together.

He gives the best back rubs, knows when I need sleep, food, a hug.
And, I feel like when I snuggle up to him I just melt.


Ahhh, life is good.

yay iphone

So it looks like I figured out how to upload more than one picture at a time. Now, if I could just figure out how to post and have pictures all together from my iphone, we'd be doing pretty darn good. One of my favorite and funniest people in the whole entire world is @ home on bedrest with her second little boy (wink wink if you're reading this) and I'm just thinking back to some old days that we spent together in college, gossiping about how fat such and such was, and how stupid such and such was. And, now we're moms. Of 2 boys each. And, I think about how wonderful life would be if we lived around the corner or across the street and we could snicker about what our boys did today that a) we loved b) we hated c) was just like their daddy c)made us laugh but we knew we couldn't in front of them. I think about how nice it would be to be able to meet up with all the kids and go for a walk or to lunch. Because, there's just something about those old friends. The ones who knew you before you got all settled into the daily rhythms and ordeals. There's something about them that just make you feel at home. So, I'm sending her ...a happy bedrest. And, I'm sending encouraging words...because being a mom is sacrifice after sacrifice. And, hug after hug. And, I'm sure that she's great at all of it. (Despite her eye-rolling) And, I'm just throwing this out there...as if moving, having a baby and a toddler at home wasn't enough...could you start a blog too so that we can have a daily dose of you and your sillyness. The sillyness that you don't think you are?

A beachy kind of moment..

My brain is just always running. Do you know that feeling? Always reeling, thoughts, things to do, dreams of tomorrow, happiness from today. Things we need from the store, things that need to be mailed, the family swaggerwagon needs an inspection and registration renewal, what are we going to plan for the boys' birthdays? You know. It's a wild conversation up there in that ole brainy brain of mine. And, then I remember a calmness. A quietness. A "peace be still" moment or moments. Boca Raton Florida--middle of July. Oceanside. Pay no attention to my grammar and fragments in this post. Anyways anyways...back to the oceanside. Breeze, salty-air. And, quietness. No rambling in my brain. No do this, do that. No don't forget about this or that. No checking the mail. No dishes or laundry. Just me and my silence and my soulmate and the moments. And, I realize it's mind over matter. I realize that I can sit here right now. With a phone ringing, a icemaker humming, and a tele monitor alarming (pt is fine, no worries :) and I can close my eyes for one second, take a deep breath and be right there. RIGHT THERE. But, as hard as I try, it just isn't the same. It's just a tease and I blink and it's back to reality. There is something, some place, some spirit, some electricity that moves within me at the beach as I listen to the waves and feel the sand that moves me. It absolutely changes me. The water comes over my ankles with each wave. When it gets sucked back in by the tide, it washes away the dirt in my soul. The stench of everyday life and makes me whole again. The ocean, it is my Jesus. (Don't hate me because I said that.) It is my rebirth, my born again, my awakening. And, I thank my soul and the universe and my god for making that power and feeling and presence on this earth for me. And, I thank my spirit and body and mind for being able to feel the power that is sleeping in the ocean, waiting for me to return.

It is my hope that somehow...everyone can find their ocean. Their silence. Own it. Feel it. Let it change you.
I promise it's there. And, I think every single day. Every day I try to get there again. And, if I could have it my way, I'd be a beach bum...happy with my house decorated with seashells and flip flops by the front door.

Love and sand from my soul to yours!
~Kimmie

Show some love

All smiles

Anything to eat in here

Love those lips

weekly yo

Hi guys! I just uploaded some pictures of Sethie today. Oh my he is just a charmer! He is getting more and more ambitious and brave and seems to be exploring more and more. I love it!! Today, he found the kitchen cabinets...thus the pots and pans! We gave him a wooden spoon and you would have thought we spent a ton of money on something fun. I hope he'll always be like that! Last week, I blogged about Drew Carey and all his weight loss. All I have to say is this: didn't do so hot this week :) But, I must say, I haven't gained any of the 12 lbs I lost with the cookie diet. It's almost been a month since I was on that diet and surprisingly I am the same weight as the day I stopped. This has me thinking....thinking of one day going on it again! I highly recommend it!
Things are pretty much the same on the job front- no real changes. I am beginning to love the people that I work with .Which only makes decisions harder. The patients drive me bonkers most of the time but the people that I work with make it bearable somehow.
I keep thinking about how much fun we had in Boca and I find myself wishing I was there all the time, enjoying the surf and the sand and the sun and looking at all the people with tons of dollars. Literally. Haha.
I got a new iphone (go ahead...lay it on me..I'm a brat, I'm spoiled, I'm sassy...) but  I love love love it! It's so easy to get used to and I love all the fun apps like bejeweled and bookworm. I find myself playing them all the time when I can.
Just wanted to say hi. I don't really have anything to carry on and on about right now. Maybe later :0)
I'm still looking forward to fall. Somethings never change :)

~Kimmie

We make music

Haha at myself

So, let's talk about what I've eaten the last few nights @ work. NOT bad...but, not exactly the DREW CAREY diet I mentioned in Friday night's post :) Schnick schnick.
Green beans (both nights) and  tonight I have rice with the green beans. I've had coffee both nights and tonight I felt a little frisky so got a big cup of Diet Mtn. Dew. The other nights I have drank water when I usually get Diet Mtn. Dew. Something must be done here. Oh yeah, and I had a pack of cheese on wheat nabs and a fiberone bar.

One of my collegues lastnight told me that if I really truly wanted to fly...I had to stop waiting for the opportunity to come to me and I had to start doing a better job of seeking it out. Meaning, I really need to be more proactive about looking for a critical care job with drips and titrations and crazyness. I wish that I could afford to take the cut in pay and work nights during the week. Then, I could take the MICU job that just opened and I'd be set. I'd definitely be able to work there for a few years and FLY. So, I'm having to be patient. It seems that patience is the one virtue that I have not really truly grasped yet. I mean, I seem to be continually tested where patience is concerned. Whether it's job related or related to other aspects of life. I struggle to just "be still" and "know." But, my middle name is FAITH. It's what I do. Maybe it should have been Patience--ha. I know and truly believe and appreciate the experiences that I have with each and every patient that I take care of. But, I'm ready for my mind to be blown. I'm ready to learn. I'm ready to save. I'm ready to feel like I'm headed in the right direction.

It's Sunday night at work...well, now it's Monday morning. This means that it's the start of another week OFF for me. This means that I will try to find time to relax my mind and spirit and be filled with the joy of my children's smiles and laughter. And, be nurtured by my husband's love. How I love Monday mornings. I hope that it's dreary and drizzly when I leave this morning. I'd love to take a morning walk with my boys along the greenway and exercise. Nothing brisk..but pleasurable.

I must stay positive and follow the "secret of life"--I must have faith that it's gonna happen for me. That things will come just as they should. Everything always works out in the end anyways. I need to eat,sleep, and dream critical care right now. I pray that the opportunity comes soon. I pray that I will be surrounded by mentors and resources, and friends and coworkers who will take me under their wings and teach me everything that they know. I know and believe TRULY that I am capable of wonderful, life-changing and life-saving things. I pray for the opportunity.

Happy Monday friends!!!
~Kimmie