heartstrings

So, I'm at work. Night 3 of the week. I'll be off until Friday night. And, I have a heavy heart here. I really feel like I need to write about it to have my feelings out. But, if I honestly start right now...I think I will be a tearful, sopping mess. So, I will blog about it after I go home and have had some rest. No worries friends, it isn't anything going on with me personally. It's about a little patient that has pulled my heart out of my chest. I hope that God watches over her, loves her, wraps his arms around her and counts all of her tears. The Bible says that God knows the hairs on our heads and does hold all of our tears. He loves her. Unsure of why I am feeling this way about someone that really isn't even my patient. Amazed that I could be so moved and so vulnerable to these feelings.
Dear God in Heaven,
I hope that you hear my heart tonight. I hope that you hear my internal sobs and are holding the tears in your hands. I really hope that the circumstances that I cannot see are different that what I think that they are. I don't know why this little girl has come into my life and I don't know why I feel this longing and hurt for her. I hope that things get figured out really soon and that when she grows up, she forgets this pain.
I know that you hear me. I know that you hear me. HEAR me God, HEAR me. You said, let the children come to me. I know you love her. I know you HEAR me.
Amen.

I will blog more about this later.
I will squeeze my babies first. And thank my god for them and every.breath.they.take.

Kimmie

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