Broke down

So, after I got home from work today, I broke down and took 2 tablespoons of castor oil mixed with orange juice before crashing for most of the day. I woke up of course, and had to go to the bathroom. We won't discuss details. I will only say that I did have some contractions shortly after that, nothing crazy and nothing regular like lastnight. Lastnight I worked in the newborn nursery at UNC and I was contracting off the chain. I think it may have been all the babies crying. I'm getting ready to go for a walk outside now that it's cooled off and not so humid. And, if nothing happends tonight, Corrie is going to come over and we're going to walk too. Maybe at the mall or something. I don't want to walk outside; it's so HOT still. I just can't take it!
One of my favorite doctors is on call tonight. Which means it'll probably be a few days before he's on call again. I was really hoping that something would give and we'd be there. But,  I know in my heart that everything happends for a reason and the timing will have to be right then.
My fingers are very swollen. So much so that I've been unable to wear my wedding band. This has been hard for me. Because I love looking down at my left ring finger and being reminded of the wonderful relationship that I have in my life always. I've been wearing it on my necklace. And, I must say I'm looking forward to wearing it on my hand again. I may have to buy a sterling silver band to wear temporarily- it's just tearing me up.
Speaking of jewelry, I went out to the mailbox today and found the charm that I ordered off of ebay. It's a sterling silver birthstone charm with Seth's birthstone. I already have one exactly like it around my neck for Parker Jay. They will both share birthdays in September! Parker Jay noticed the extra baby on my necklace tonight.He said, "babies." So cute, I told him one was Parker Jay and one was Seth. I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror with both of them on my necklace and thought to myself how odd it is to think that I'm going to be the mommy of 2 little boys. How amazing. Even better, I'm the wife of a wonderful husband. All because I decided not to settle for less than what I deserve.
My friend Macy asked Parker Jay tonight where Seth was....he lifted up his shirt and pointed to his stomach. It was priceless.
I'm so thankful today; overly thankful and reflecting on all the blessings in my life. To think that I am 26 years old, and have so much love in my life. So much acceptance and meaning. And, so many people and memories that mean the most to me.  So, I'm thankful for the karma, the juju, the dharma, the universe, my god, allah, the sun, the son...for all that has come to me. And the prayer and meditation in my heart is that the raining down of blessings will continue.
Baby love,
Kimmie